Cheers!

New Year's Eve used to be a time to par-tay. Now I'm hoping that I don't have to stay up past midnight because whenever I do I end up super grouchy and yell at my kids all day.

New Year's Day used to be a time to sleep 'till noon to avoid a hang over, wake up gradually and then enjoy a meal cooked by somebody else. Now I hope that my son stays in bed until "his clock turns green" and we can enjoy a somewhat peaceful family meal, either breakfast, lunch or dinner (I'm not picky). And by peaceful I mean no tears, no whining, and no spills...I'll still have to get up every other bite for ketchup or extra napkins or more tea.

Then I would spend an hour getting ready for the big par-tay. Now I take a five minute shower so I can leave as soon as the sitter arrives. Then I would drink margaritas and too many beers and munch on chips and salsa. Now I may sip a mimosa or two and enjoy a real dinner. Then I would play cards or spoons or the infamous vegetable game (butter bean, butter bean calling on corn, corn!). Now I play Scrabble or The New Yorker or Wii (tennis rules!). Then I would hope to have a bed with sheets. Now I know that my comfy pillows await.

Then was fun and carefree but often empty. Now is a different kind of fun but always full.

Check out the pic of me and my hubby our first New Year's after we were married. Hmmm, carefree alright!

You'll Shoot Your Eye Out

Yesterday I returned from celebrating Christmas with my dad's side of the family. That half always gets together the weekend before Santa visits. We all traveled home in one piece but we may not stay that way. My father gave me a shotgun for Christmas.

Yes, I said shotgun. What in the world will I do with a shotgun? I haven't the foggiest. Maybe I can shoot the pesty beavers if they ever return (that's another story). My hubby has begged for a gun for over a year. He said we needed one for protection.

"Protection from what?," would aways be my answer, "Beavers?" Then I would laugh while his shoulders slumped.

I'm beginning to wonder if my sweet, honest hubby and my loving, doting dad premeditated this year's gift. Hmmmm? Time will tell.

In the meantime, I'm taking notes and maybe, just maybe one day I'll be the proud owner of a precious pound puppy!

Some of My Favorite Things

So far this has been the best Christmas season ever! I should probably stop right now and knock on wood because last year was a nightmare. Due to a stomach bug that invaded my family I did not leave the house for 10 days. Ten days!

Anywho, thought I would share with you several of my favs.

#1 My son's Christmas vest

It was given to us by a lovely family friend and I think I love it so because Dylan wants to wear it everyday.

#2 Centerpiece on Dining Table

I stuck cloves in tangerines. Just call me Martha! The smell is, well, if I must say so...perfect:

#3 Easy Candy

At 250 degrees melt Rolos on top of pretzels for 4 minutes. Then smash a pecan on top. Cool and store. Delish and easy, easy, easy!

I could go on and on with my favorites list but I shall stop now and get some sleep. Although my posts seem to be dwindling I do think about the blogger world daily. Is that normal?

May God bless you all and I wish you a very Merry Christmas!! (Just in case I don't get back before Santa visits!)

Alarm Clock #2

Ahhhh, la de da la, ahhhh.

Do you hear that? It's the sound of angels singing. My son stayed in his room until the clock turned green at 6:30AM this morning! My daughter is still sleeping...it is currently 7:20AM! It's a joyous occasion. Granted I heard Dylan playing the bongos before the rooster crows but hey, I'll just make sure the drums are gone tonight prior to lights out.

Visions of serious slumber make me smile as I know gradually that clock will turn green later and later. Ahhhhh.

yuck

I want to write everyday. I do. Sometimes, though, I can't get to the computer or my notebook. Sometimes I have so many ideas bouncing around upstairs that I am unable to make sense of it all. Recently, however, I have been battling the yuck.

What is the yuck you may ask.

First it's hand, foot, mouth had by my son and husband. Second it's pink eye shared between my son and daughter then given to me. Third is a nasty ear, nose and throat infection passed from son to daughter. Fourth is me going crazy from the overwelming amount of blisters, eye goo, snot, runny diapers, and lack of natural vitamin D... a.k.a. yuck.

MaBet's Playhouse

My grandmother transformed an empty corner of a guest room into a child's wonderland. It is complete with a mini-kitchen and baby bassinet. A small shelf contains real food such as (empty) pancake syrup bottles, now antique metal spice boxes, and milk cartons. Eye level with a child a real frame hangs on the wall with picture art cut from a New Yorker.

Old lonely baby dolls with handmade clothes are the permanent residents. However, the magic does not go unnoticed. My son loves that space just as much as I once did. I can count on one hand how many times he has played there but whenever MaBet is mentioned he smiles as he remembers baking muffins and writing letters in her playhouse.

As Christmas nears I look forward to visiting with aunts and uncles, eating ham and homemade pie, and popping bubble wrap, but the kid in me is most excited to join Dylan in MaBet's Playhouse.

Alarm Clock

Recently my lovely children have been waking up before 6:00AM. Even though I am a morning person that is entirely too early. Monday before daylight I yelled at my son twice and ran up and down the stairs several times. While my blood was pumping and I knew that sleep was no more I look over at my hubby and he was snoring. Snoring! How in the world could I be out of breath, angry and craving coffee and he is in dreamland? Not fair!

In my fit of AM rage I searched on-line for answers. I found an alarm clock for toddlers that turns green when it is time to rise and shine. Of course I bought it...over $40 with shipping and handling. Outrageous, I know, but the sleep deprived will do crazy things. Buyer's remorse has settled in but it's too late now. Maybe it will be worth it, I'll let you know.

Gobble Gobble

Today I am thankful for my little turkeys and my sweet hubby. Thank you Blogger.com for being an outlet for expression and a place to capture memories...like Dylan's Thanksgiving pre-school production.

The following song (to the tune of I'm a Little Teacup) has been sung in our home 50 million times...

I'm a little turkey fluffy and brown. My feathers flip flop as I turn around. I've got lots of feathers on my back and a big orange beak that goes clip clap. Gobble Gobble!

Steppin' Out with My Hubby

Today marks a day in our family history. My husband went Christmas shopping with me! We didn't get it all done, but that's o.k. I enjoyed his company and appreciated his opinion.

I figured since he took a leap I should do the same and let him choose lunch. Being the loving, thankful wife that I am I compromised my health and ate at Five Guys. I feel like a huge grease ball but my cheese burger sure was scrumptious.

We also have different tastes in music so we took turns (fought) over the car radio. Hubby wanted to listen to his favorite jam bands like Phish and Yonder Mt. String Band that play 40 day long songs. I was hoping for more poppier (is that a word?) tunes from the likes of Alicia Keys and Jason Mraz. However, there was one music genre upon which we agreed...OLD SCHOOL RAP!

Sirius Radio has a great station called BackSpin that plays Biz Markie, Digital Underground, Warren G., Snoop Dog, Dr. Dre, etc. Oh, yeah...it took us back and we sung out loud like no one was watching...until we approached a stoplight and then we toned it down a bit.

My charming other half still knows every word to Humpty Dance. Impressive, huh? This is definitely one shopping trip that will go down in the books..."Stop what your doin' 'cause I'm about to ruin the image and the style that you're used to."

This and That

Sweet little faces are snoozing away in my bedroom. I wonder what they are dreaming.

----------
The hustle of the holiday season has begun and I pray to remember to take deep breaths and enjoy it all. Usually I am done Christmas shopping by now but not this year. I guess having two children makes it tougher.

----------

We had a BIG weekend. It started with Dylan's preschool Thanksgiving party. He was a cute turkey and lunch was fun. Old family friends spent Friday and Saturday nights with us. Saturday we shopped and dined out. It was nostalgic catching up and in perfect timing with the holidays. Sunday we went to church and then lunch at Grandma's. Hmmm, bbq chicken, potato salad, deviled eggs, collards, hush puppies, slaw, and 50 million desserts. Can't beat it! We were too full to eat supper so we watched Alvin and The Chipmunks and popped popcorn.

It's Snowing!

My husband, also known as The Weather Dork, jumped out of bed this morning at the first sound that our son was awake. This action is very rare...but he knew the possibility of winter precipitation.

As if he had won the lottery he bounced back into the bedroom. "Look Girlfriend," he said as he pulled open the blinds. "It's snowing!"

Thoughts of hibernation and the good-life of bears loomed under my comforter. Ahhh. Sleep all winter. How dreamy!

His excitement then spread to our son like a bad cold...then to our baby. Our household had the unstoppable "It's Snowing!" energy before 7AM.

Hot cocoa anyone?

Cloud Nine

Still basking in my delightful weekend without kids I've taken a new approach to housework. I'm not going to do any. O.K., that's a big fat lie but I'm not going to feel guilty if it doesn't get done today or even tomorrow. I'm going to switch that guilt to writing. If I don't write something I may just be slightly disappointed in myself.

I'll leave the window for writing very wide, as not to be too drastic. Hopefully I'll free write or work on a poem everyday but a blog, letter, or long email will allow me to at least check it off my list.

A great point was made at the writing conference...
"You make the effort to exercise your body why wouldn't you take the time to exercise your creative self?"

Amen.

Writing and More Writing

This weekend I had the pleasure of attending the NC Writers' Network 2008 Fall Conference. I was in over my head, for sure, but luckily they provided life jackets...the bright orange ones that you feel slightly silly wearing but are so very thankful for their ability to float.

Writing as a hobby will always be a part of me. I'm somewhat terrified to take it seriously so I don't think I can yet call it a passion. Not like the Artists I learned from the past few days...you know the ones who can make you laugh and cry and love and hate in a matter of minutes. My creative basket is full and I'm pretty sure I've never uttered those words. Too early I woke up this morning and immediately began smiling. I have so much to write...thank yous, short stories, poems, blogs, prompts, and revisions.

Doggy paddling will do for now. It'll get me there, I hope!

Hey You

If you could talk to your 17 year old self what would you say?

Would you tell you to lighten up or study more? Eat healthier or enjoy those fries? Get more sleep or watch the classic movies? Practice makes perfect or perfection is subjective? Be more kind or grow thicker skin? Devote more time to God, to your family, to your friends?

I've envisioned my conversation going something like this...

"Hey you! I'm so happy to be you. I know you haven't given me much thought, yet, and I think that's worked to our advantage. I would, however, like to tell you a few things. Give your mom a break, she's human and she loves you more than you'll ever know...at least until you meet Dylan. No, not 90210 Dillon. You'll see. Stop laying in the sun with baby oil. Try SPF 30. OK, I'll take SPF 15. Wear your shorts as short as you can...you won't have those thighs for very long. It's o.k. to fall in love. No, not with him. Wait a few years. It's o.k. to cry. It's o.k. to cry in front of people. You are smart, even if you can't spell and have a bad sense of direction. Spell check and MapQuest are on their way. Just because someone is wealthy does not mean they are crooked. Jesus should not freak you out, just read the Bible and decide for yourself. Stop smoking...that's just gross and you look ridiculous, not mysterious. Share your poetry. Share your feelings. Soak in your athletic experiences...the friendships, the victories and losses, the bus rides, and thank your coaches. Thank your teachers, especially your Algebra II teacher. Moving this final year of high school is preparing you for college. You have a really good attitude about it but stop using it as leverage. College is going to be trying, remember who you are...be kind to yourself and your body. What? Oh, you have to go? Everyone is meeting at the courthouse, I understand. Have fun!"

Trailers and Reviews

I am a sucker for movie trailers and book reviews.

We have an HDTV channel that frequently plays 30 minutes of trailers. I looooove it! Also, I get antsy when going to the movies with a new friend because she may not understand my passion for what comes before the main attraction. Popcorn will wait.

Amazon.com just sent me their Top 10 Book List for 2008. Ahh, the joy. I have read the blurbs of the first three and am looking forward to reading the remaining seven. Oh, and don't get me started on how long it takes me to update our Netflix que.

Why do I find the short renditions so appealing you may ask? I asked myself the same question just before I started this post. Maybe it's from my generation's quest for immediate gratification (I know that's why I like to iron) or because it takes me entirely too long to read a book (hence, Wicked). Maybe it's my fear of commitment (I used to have one before I met my hubby) or a touch of grown-up ADD (caused by the Noggin channel).

With two young children I no longer read books in a day or watch movies back to back. That's o.k., I know my movie and book mojo will return in due time. Until that glorious moment I can get my fix with trailers and reviews.

Beware Baby and Toddler Goblins!

They come seeking candy! Happy Halloween!

Need a Nap

Tick tock, dribble

Tick tock, dribble

Tick tock, dribble

Naaaay

Wait a minute...what was that??

While trying to nap yesterday I was peacefully being hypnotized by the clock and kitchen sink. All of a sudden I heard a horse. Yes, I said a h-o-r-s-e.

Needless to say I did not nap. Not only could I not get over the barnyard animal somewhere in my home but political phone calls took over my land line.

Inbetween the annoying recorded voices and tiptoeing as not to wake the babies I discovered the "nay" was from a wooden animal puzzle that obviously makes noises when a piece is placed. The room had darkened due to gloomy-perfect-napping-even-both-babies-are-sleeping-at-the-same-time-weather and I guess the puzzle thought a match had been made.

I'd probably be certifiable crazy by now with all the election negativity (on TV, on the radio, in the mail, and phone calls) paired with my sleep deprivation (thank you, Baby Sister, for waking at 4AM for 4 days in a row) if it weren't for Tina Fey and Tivo. She cracks me up!

Betcha naps aren't very Mavericky.

Oh no, it's gone!

I've mentioned before how my son loves to eat. (It runs in the family.) Today we stopped at a grill downtown and I ordered him a grilled cheese and fries. Once he devoured his sandwich and took a swig of pink lemonade he looked down at his plate and looked up quickly with surprised eyes.

He said, "Oh, no! My sandwich is gone!"

My obnoxious laugh (also runs in the family) filled the restaurant so that I had to cover my mouth and pinch my nose. I'm not sure if he thought someone had swiped his food or if this was a ploy to get another grilled cheese but he soon started laughing, too. Then Baby Sister got in on the action and the three of us giggled until my eyes started to water.

Lunch was so much fun that I didn't realize until we got home that my son had ketchup from ear to ear, literally. I bet the grill staff and other paying customers were glad to see us "gone."

Daffodil

I am a Daffodil What Flower Are You?

Thing 1 & 2

Here are the two of the best "things" in my world.

Thing 1 and Thing 2, just so you know

I adore watching you as you grow

Bigger and sweeter you get everyday

Also, silly and smart in so many ways

I treasure your bowls of cereal and footed pajamas

and will forever be your loving momma!

Motherhood Gives You Man Hands

Not too long ago I looked down at my hands and gasped. Someone had swapped my hands with my grandmother's...minus the pearl-white polish. Ahhh, the horror!

Isn't 31 years of age too early for hand wrinkles? And the protruding veins. Where in the world did they come from???

A couple of weeks later after 45,000 hand scrubs due to attempted potty training I was shocked again. Dry, red, and cracking...very lumberjack-ish.

Then it dawned on me. I have man hands because no longer do I treat myself with French manicures. It's hard to believe that I once took the time to place those little white stickers just so. I should have been reading Shakespeare or learning to cook the perfect meal.

Lotion, lotion, lotion. I now have it everywhere, by every sink, in the car, diaper bags, bed side table, living room end tables, you name it. I am happy to announce that my hands no longer dry or cracking. Yea, applause. However, the veins seem to be highlighted by my new love of lotion. Boo, thumbs down.

Oh, well. Motherhood gives you man hands. Just add it to the list:)

Happily Ever After

I love weddings. The idea of two people falling for one another and then shouting it out to the world speaks to me. What speaks to me even more are 64 year wedding anniversaries.

My husband's grandparents have been married that long. They have 6 children, 3 grandchildren, and 6 great grandchildren and here's the kicker...we all get along! Holidays, Sunday lunches, and beach trips with this crew is always a huge party. Amongst the chaos of our gatherings it's comforting to look over and see the happy couple sitting together smiling at what they helped to create.

I know that not everyone is as lucky to have things work out that way but I sure hope and pray that I do!

Pac Man

My son loves food. So much so that I bet others think I never feed him.

Today we went to Subway for lunch and he ate a 6 inch pizza sub. He's 2 and a half. He also ate half a bag of Cheetos...I stuck the other half in my purse and told him we were saving them for later. While he was eating, every five minutes or so he would say with too much enthusiasm, "Hmmm, this is good!" Other restaurant goers smiled at us but I could tell what they were really thinking.

Earlier this week some friends stopped by just before supper-time. There was a bowl of grapes on the table. He ate most of the bowl (sharing maybe two) and then said, "Mommy, is it time to eat?" I put out some chips and dip for him and our company and he hovered over the appetizer like a hawk.

He's in constant motion and grows so fast ~ I understand his hunger. However, I could probably curtail some of his hunger...with more veggies!

Happy Birthday, Mimi.

"Hey, we're on our way."

"O.K. See you in a few."

"Oh no!"

"What happened?"

"Mimi's cake just flew from the top of my car. Damn it."

"You left something else on top of the car? Ha ha ha! Oh well, she probably didn't want it anyway."

"Whatever. I'm turning around. Maybe no cars will come."

"Are you in the neighborhood?"

"No, I'm on 97."

"Please don't sacrifice our kids for that cake."

"I won't. Uh, oh. Here come two cars."

"Jesus, are you stopped in the middle of the road."

"Huh? No, not yet."

"Please be careful."

"I'm fine, we're fine, and yeaaaaa the cars didn't hit the cake. Hold on a minute, I'm getting out."

"But, wait...."

"Wow. It's not even all that messed up. I'll just tell her that her grandson dropped it. Like father like son, right?"

"You're unbelievable."

"See you at Mimi's in about 10 minutes?"

"O.K. but I'm telling her the truth."

Just a T-shirt

Ever forget what you were wearing until someone makes a comment?

At the beach this weekend I had hoped to walk on the pier. Finally, I made the trek Sunday morning just before check-out. Not much was biting but the view from the observation deck was better than I had remembered. The ocean has the ability to make me a kid again and I adore the sound and smell of my childhood.

I could have stayed for hours but my adult responsibilities were calling. As I walked down the deck stairs I heard, "Did you go to Yale?" My immediate thoughts were, "Huh? Me?"

Thankfully, I just said, "No," and remembered I was wearing one of my husband's t-shirts. (He loves $0.99 t-shirts from a local Mortex Outlet).

The fisherman smiled and said aristocratically, "Well, we have nothing to talk about."

Then we both laughed.

I chuckled most of the way home at his humor and the idea of me attending Yale. I continued to giggle as my thoughts turned to first impressions and stereotypes. All of which can seem quite...silly.

Bed Head

The Other Side

I have started reading Wicked by Gregory McGuire and am intrigued. Creative only scratches the surface to describing his writing. One critic compared Elphaba, the main character, to Alice and the Hobbit. I have to agree.

This book is about the Wicked Witch of the West ~ her side of the story. Never thought I'd feel compassion for that mean green character. How often do we base our opinions, thoughts, feelings towards someone on just one side of the story?

First impressions can fall under the same umbrella. I'd hate for someone to base their opinion of moi in the morning on the way to pre-school. I need at least 2 cups of coffee and a shower before I can be somewhat charming. Nothing says "needs help" like greasy hair, raccoon eyes, and continuous yawning.

The Weekend

Right now I am listening to the sound of our lawn mower. It means that my hubby is home. It means that it's the weekend. The hum is comforting and I love the smell of fresh cut grass.

Thankfully, my husband takes such pride in our yard. If it were up to me the grass would be replaced naturally by pine straw and the only flowers would be wild. He has landscaped it beautifully and keeps it so.

Encore azaleas bloom several times a year around our home and a passion flower vine winds up our back steps. Scattered day lilies, hydrangeas, magnolias, dogwood trees, and Japanese maples also decorate our yard. One of our favorites is a thriving weeping willow that was once chewed down by a family of beavers.

Usually, lunch comes next followed by family nap time. I do love the weekend!

Preschool

Hooray for preschool! Today is the first full day for my toddler and he barely told me goodbye this morning when I dropped him off.

I had sweet, delusional visions of free time but it's already 12:30 and I'm picking him up at 1:00. So much for blogging, taking a shower, or writing thank you notes. I did conquer the grocery store with a hungry newborn. Nothing like a crying baby in the check out line.

Gotta go. More later. I hope.

All Things Mommy

When I started this blog I had the idea that I would write, write, write and not all about being a mom. However, looking at my posts they are mostly about just that. Sometimes I sit in front of the computer and think, "What can I write today that doesn't include snotty noses or burp cloths." Those days I tend to leave without even a paragraph.

Often I get inspired by a great sentence in a book or lyric in a song but by the time I get to the computer it has been wiped out by a sea of edible gold fish and apple juice. I long to feel like the grown up that I am but it's hard when I'm surrounded by silly cartoons and soft baby blankets. When I finally get to go to dinner with friends I find myself struggling to talk about worldly events or engage in conversations that require more than six word sentences. My brain is mommy mush.

I know that I am more than a mom. I know that I am intelligent, or at least used to be and can replenish it one day. I tell myself that being a mom is the most important job in the world so if I have to sacrifice knowing that the only five syllable words I'll use for a while are names of dinosaurs, so be it.

Salty Peaches

Salty peaches are not good. In fact, they are disgusting.

Tonight at dinner I had a lovely bowl of fresh peaches with plump blueberries on the table before anything else. Oh, and the salt and pepper shakers. I was soooo excited to have something delicious and healthy as a part of dinner. The past few nights have been take-out or processed boxed, canned, or frozen junk so you may imagine my delight as I peeled the juicy peaches and washed the berries.

My ancestors would not believe what I had to go through to get fresh fruit. First, I had to strap my two and half year old and a two month old in their car seats. Then I had to drive 20 minutes to a local farm stand, put Big Brother's shoes back on, unload the youngins, and strap Baby Sister into her Baby Bjorn in order to have my arms free to gather.

While I was checking out the produce and keeping Big Brother from touching every last tomato I managed to bag snap beans, sweet potatoes, and squash. As I headed to pay for my loot I smelled them...the peaches. The warm summer day brought the sweet aroma to me with a purpose. The blueberries were beside them for reasons other than impulse buying, I just know it. I added the two fruits to my purchase right after quieting Baby Sister with her paci and telling Big Brother to put his shoes on right this minute.

While walking towards the car I got the feeling that everyone was glad to see us go, a feeling that's becoming a bit too comfortable. It took my son forever to walk across the gravel parking lot as he did not put his shoes back on right that minute or the rest of the day. Because I am the master of multitasking I was making sure he didn't get hit by a car or tractor as I took her out of the carrier and put her back in her car seat. Then I strapped him in his car seat and loaded my goodies and amazingly drove home with a smile. Happy because of my goodies not because of Baby Sister's hungry cry.

I know I'm dragging out this story but I want you to understand the disgust behind the salty peaches.

Back to the delicious bowl of fresh fruit on my dinner table tonight... I was going to gobble all that I could during our meal and eat the left overs for dessert with Cool Whip while watching Grey's Anatomy (even if it's a rerun). That dream faded as I heard, "Mom, I put pepper now!"

In slow motion I turned to see my son standing over the prized dish and reaching for the pepper. "Salt, Mommy, I did salt," said the minature creature I used to adore. Ruined. I even tried to rinse and sprinkle with sugar.

Salty peaches are not good. In fact, they are disgusting.

We Made It!

Fun is watching my 2 year old run on the beach. Full speed ahead with a wide grin he'd run until he had to catch a breather. So cute! Baby Sister was the lucky recipient of extra hugs and kisses from family and friends which was nice because it was too hot to have her outside for long.

I love the way my son says "sunscreen" and I love rinsing the sand off his tiny feet. I love the salty air and fresh seafood. I love when my hubby is relaxed. I love listening my mom and aunt coo with the baby.

We survived the beach trip and had a fantastic time. The ride home was hard and I thought about running away but once on familiar ground we all napped for several hours.

Vacations are special but home is bliss!

Big Brother and Baby Sister

This is why my cup runneth over:)

Packing Nightmare

The family is going to the beach. Am I crazy for taking a breastfeeding six week old? I already know the answer but looking for affirmation (or better yet, a rebuttal) is somewhat comforting.

Traveling light is in the past. In my single days I used to take off in my Jeep Wrangler with the top down and one bag. O.K., maybe two...the second for my shoes. Now our vehicle will contain two kiddie car seats, a pack-n-play for the baby, a wagon to wheel all things beachy, beach chairs and toys, hopefully only 2 large suitcases, diaper bags, sheets and towels, several books and night-nights, snacks, sunscreen and hats...oh, dear what am I forgetting?

Caffeine and headache medicine.

We All Scream

This year for Father's Day I gave my hubby a 3 month membership to the Ice Cream of the Month Club. Oh yeah, that's right. The gift that keeps on giving.

In June we received four pints of gourmet ice cream packed in dry ice delivered to our front door. One pint was full of gooey caramel, one was chocolaty chocolate, one butter pecan, and the last was plain 'ol delicious vanilla.

We've been looking forward to our next delivery. Hubby has come home from work the past couple of days only to make a B-line to the freezer. His disappointment is obvious but the wait is worth the little bit of heaven on Earth that shall soon grace our doorstep!

Kicked Out

Last night I took my son to see a renowned storyteller. She was fabulous. Beautiful dreadlocks, bright smile and very animated.

We got escorted out by the security guard.

As soon as we entered the children's section of the library my 2 year old saw a stuffed dinosaur and wanted to make sure that I saw it too. His excitement sent the librarian's eyebrows to the ceiling and got us pegged as trouble-makers right away by security. I made the very bad decision to join the crowd anyway. He listened for a good five minutes and then became more interested in playing with a friend.

We moved to another section of the library after realizing that listening to the artist was a lost cause. My son has two volumes. Loud and louder. Three times the security guard came over. Twice to tell us to be quiet and once to tell him to put his shoes back on. Finally, I said, "OK, sorry, we're leaving." The man who was only doing his job walked us out. As we were going down the stairs at a turtle pace my little hooligan turns around to say, "Mommy, is dat policeman coming wid us?"

Autopilot

It's amazing how a mother's body functions on little sleep, isn't it? You just do it...Nike thought they came up with the top selling slogan but it's actually the original Mommy Motto.

Here are some things I've learned about myself lately:

I can change a diaper in the dark. I can nap for 10 minute intervals. I can listen to my husband vent about work while playing my 2 year old's "What's That" game and hold a paci in Baby's mouth all at the same time. I can dance to the Wiggles while rocking Baby to sleep. I can go 2 days without taking a shower (thank God for hats). I can eat mac-n-cheese and raisins. I can feed Baby while playing Super Man with Big Brother. I can tell people "no." I can talk on the phone only when driving...damn the new cell phone law.

I can do just about anything. It may embody spit up and play dough...but I can probably do it!

She's Here!

At 11:25AM on Thursday, June 19th the tiny dancer arrived. She is soft and sweet and I'm falling in love all over again.

Big Brother likes to hold her, says "stinky" when I change her, and looks for her when she's not around.

Daddy is already spun tight around that mini-pinky.

We sure are lucky!!

Got a minute?

I love getting these via email.

What time did you get up today? 7ish
Diamonds or pearls? Both, please.
Latest movie in a movie theater? 21
Favorite TV series? Grey's Anatomy, What Not to Wear
What did you have for breakfast? coffee and french toast
What’s your middle name? Lamb
Favorite food? Italian or Mexican
Which food don't you like? BBQ (shhh, it's a sin here in Eastern NC!)
What's your favorite CD at the moment? Grace Potter or Alicia Keys
What car do you drive? Subaru Outback
Favorite sandwich? Roast Beef sub all the way
What are your favorite clothes? comfy jeans, long sleeved t-shirts
If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? back to Hawaii
Favorite clothing brand? Ann Taylor Loft, GAP, Old Navy, Banana Republic
Where would you like to retire? NC beaches
Favorite time of day? When hubby gets home from work
Where were you born? Lumberton, NC
Which is your favorite sport to watch? tennis
Coke or Pepsi? Dt. Coke
Soccer or hockey? soccer
Are you a morning person or a night owl? Morning...annoyingly so
Pedicure or manicure? Pedicure, espcecially since I haven't been able to touch my toes in weeks!
Any exciting news to share? I'm being induced in less than two days!!
What did you want to become as a child? A daycare owner and hair stylist
Best childhood memory? beach trips
Ever been to Africa? No
Ever rolled anybody in toilet paper? Yes, and egged, too. I'm sorry.
Have you ever been in a car accident? Nothing serious
Favorite day of the week? Saturday
Favorite flower? daisies
Hot dog or Chinese food? Chinese, can't do hotdogs
Do you own a bike? No, but would like an Earth Cruiser
Who was you latest e-mail from? Oprah.com
Where would you like to shop more if you could afford to? NYC
Bed time? 9:30 - 10:00ish
Latest person to share dinner with? Hubby and son
What are you up to now? Finishing a short story for my son. My hubby decided he wanted to help so I'm taking a break while he colors some of the illustrations
Favorite color? yellow
How many tattoos? none, yet

Mourning of the Thong

In the nesting phase of my second pregnancy I have cleaned out most closets and this morning...my delicates drawer. In my 20s I would have called it lingerie. Today it's just my underwear and according to my 2 year old they are "big boy unders."

Crammed in the back of the bottom drawer were numerous pairs of thongs. Pretty, some lacy, some cutesy, little things that I wore years ago. Why was I hanging on to them? To remind me of what my butt used to look like? To remind me of my honeymoon and the several years that followed...before a child entered our lives and The Wiggles invaded our bedroom? To make me come to terms that no matter how fast I try to lose this baby weight that I will never again be comfortable in what should be called perma-wedgie wear?

Whatever the reason I was hording these floss like pieces of cloth I mourned their absence. After putting them in the trash I reflected on what I used to be...or at least, looked like. For several years they were all I wore...as underwear, not really all that I wore. With jeans, work suits, and even summer dresses thongs were the foundation of my clothing. How had I gone from matching lingerie to big momma underwear?

Feeling a little sorry for myself and contently riding the emotional roller coaster of pregnancy hormones I was sitting on my bed with my son allowing him to watch too much TV. In this daze I was remembering confidently getting dressed for parties and dinner out with my new hubby when my little boy snapped me back to the present. He put his chubby little hand on my mammoth belly, snuggled up close and said, "I kiss baby sister." He then leaned down for the sweetest peck I've ever witnessed.

Suddenly, the mourning ceased. I now have closure. Thongs, may you rest in peace.

Magnets

Are you a magnet? Do you attract or repel?

Apparently I attract objects flying from moving vehicles. Twice the hood of my car has been damaged by things from other automobiles. One was a hunk of metal from an 18 wheeler and the other was a mini-log from a rickety trailer pulled behind a shiny SUV. Luckily no one was hurt either time.

My brother used to attract bug bites. During the summer he would be covered in mosquito bites from playing hide and seek at dusk or horsefly bites from a day at the pool. Me, not one red swell. I used to brag that it was because I was a faster runner and swimmer but really worried if he was sweet and I was sour.

My mom was a positive magnet for teenagers. I always, always had friends over in high school and college. Sometimes they would be there sitting in our kitchen talking with Mom when I got home from tennis practice or a weekend at my father's. This continued past my teen years...she was involved, I think, because she knew how hard those years can be.

Share your positive and negative charges with others...I bet some interesting conversations will emerge:)

Love

Do you ever wake up with so much love in your heart it's hard to start the day? Very rare are these moments for me but it's bringing me to write this morning.

I'm about to have a baby girl. I have a beautiful husband and a healthy 2year old boy. I love my home, my bed, my yard, and even my kitchen. Although I'm not very fond of my double chins right now I am thankful, so very thankful, that I am able to carry the angel inside.

I love my family and friends. I love the town in which I live and I love the tiny church that we attend. I love to eat and watch tv (at the same time). I love tennis, the beach, boat riding, petting cats and dogs, listening to the rain. I love watching my son grow and listening to his point of view. I love new shoes and clothes that fit. I love little notes from my husband. I love music videos in the morning and radio without commercials. I love original art and local accents. I love finger nail polish and lipstick. I love to laugh, especially the giggles. I love America and Mother Earth. I love great conversations. I love when my son plays the piano or harmonica (sounds only a mother could love).

I love, love, love, to love.

Update...

I am 36 weeks preggie and so very ready for this little angel to make her appearance.

I have done fairly well with my "consumption shopping." I think I have purchased only one hat and three shirts and one tube of lipstick for myself since the related post. Didn't really need the hat, outgrew the maternity shirt hand me downs, and the lipstick was to make me feel better about the fact that my face resembles a balloon.

Boat rides are not very soothing when you are super pregnant and your husband drives at record speed to get you home in order to use the restroom.

The weather has been perfect this Spring!

My toddler fractured his collar bone by pulling our tv on top of himself. I keep waiting for social services to show up.

Haven't finished the Eckart Tolle book but haven't given up either. Gave up on Missing Mom by Joyce Carol Oates. Started The Life all Around Me by Ellen Foster by Kaye Gibbons.

Hung some of my son's art work in my kitchen...it's my favorite to date.

Must take a nap before son wakes up....

"Go to zoo now?"

These were the words of my 2 year old for almost 2 weeks. I made the mistake of telling him that we were going to the zoo on Boyfriend's next day off. Since Boyfriend is a small business owner his days off are unpredicatable.

"Go to zoo after nap?"
"Go to zoo when daddy come home?"
"Go to zoo now?"

It was cute at first. After about the 1000th time I was ready to take him to PetSmart and call it a day.

I'm glad I hung in there because we all had the best time and made memories that will forever last. The sea lions took 1st prize in my son's eyes. He loved watching them gracefully twist underwater. He was scared by a gorilla who had fun with the crowd and the "big elfants" and "tall raffs" received much praise and a few rounds of applause.

I'm exhausted, still. Being over 7 months preggie walking around a zoo trying to keep up with an over-excited 2 year old will help one find religion...and any place to sit.

Dream #3

I dream that life as a stay at home mom fills my cup.

I dream of feeling a real sense of accomplishment when my son is potty trained or can tie his shoes. I dream of hanging laundry out to dry while my children blow bubbles.

I dream of long summer days with the neighborhood kids in and out. I dream of serving lemonade and cookies, making hopscotch sqares in the driveway, and hula-hooping until my sides hurt.

I dream of homework spread across the kitchen table and telling teenagers to turn down their music. I dream of best friends and first dates and spring breaks.

I dream that my kids grow up to be caring and helpful people and always want to visit home.

Quiet house

Ahhh, sweet silence.

No cartoon voices, no referee whistles, no weather update.
No whining, no work phone calls, no appliances running.

This is a part of life I used to dread. Being alone and surrounded by quiet left me bored and uncomfortable. Now, it's a part of life I crave.

The possibilities are limitless. I can finish reading The Other Boleyn Girl, I can blog, I can work on my new book idea. I can take a long bath, paint my nails, and floss my teeth. Whoa, watch out social-lites! It's 7:30pm on a Friday evening and I'm in a quiet house.

Lucky, lucky me!

Whole Foods

Whole Foods is one of my favorite places to eat. Tonight my son and I had pizza, his was cheese mine was garden veggie. We shared a chocolate milk (whole milk!) and a fruit/granola parfait. OH MY GOD, it was so delicious! Every bite, every gulp was simply divine.

Fresh mozzarella was melted under big chunks of ripe tomato and yellow bell peppers and sauteed onions and broccoli. Perfection was the pizza sauce. Whole milk usually makes me gag but tonight it was so very chocolaty and creamy and smooth. Juicy pineapple paired with strawberries mixed with vanilla yogurt and granola pieces was the grand finale. All deserved an encore!

Sharing a chocolate milk with a child needs to be added to your bucket list if you haven't done so already. While pushing the milk carton across the table back and forth, back and forth after long gulps from an over sized straw I witnessed a delight so innocent and sincere. I hope I always remember the happiness he brings to my world...especially when I begin potty-training.

Grudges

Are you a grudge holder? I use to think of myself as not...but I'm beginning to notice when I get anxious or mad or just plain uncomfortable it usually traces back to me harboring ill feelings.

As much as I would like to I can not control what others do or their lack of doing. Sure I can encourage and nag and persuade or I can just let it go. If I want something done my way, when I want it done, I should just go ahead a do it...even if it's not my turn. "Not my turn"...what am I, in 7th grade? Reflecting now, it seems so juvenile.

I'm reading Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth, Awakening to Your Life's Purpose and a quote from that book brought me to this whole grudge holding epiphany.

"...sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on."

It's easy for me to get mad at my husband for not taking our son to get his hair cut or a fellow employee for botching an important record. It's hard on me to let it stew.

Letting go feels so good.

More?

Lately I've been thinking about consumption. Not just food because, yes, I'm hungry all the time thanks to the tiny dancer in my belly, but overall. How long could I go without buying new shoes, new clothes, new make-up, new stuff? I wonder? Do I have the strength to try to prolong my visits to Target?

I'm going to try. I do not need anymore maternity clothes due to a friend's generous donation of hand-me-downs. I have enough make-up to last at least 6 months. I have more shoes than should be legal.

Here's a problem. I love holidays and season changes. Easter is around the corner and I don't think I can resist. The Easter Bunny has to visit! I can bypass 4th of July without spending, I think. I will use old or natural Fall decor. Halloween...love it!

Ok, no need to go cold turkey, right? I'll start with my selfish/vainity items and re-evaluate in a few months. I'll let you know how I do. Wish me luck:)

The River

Sounds of the river ease my spirit. Sitting on the porch enjoying sweet tea I hear ducks, a wood pecker and the neighbor's sometimes annoying dog. When the wind blows the wind chimes sing, the trees rustle and the screen doors clap.

Often I can read on the porch for hours. Not today. For some reason these sounds are more interesting.

School pictures

Yesterday when I picked up my son from school picture proofs were waiting for me in his cubby. All three poses made me laugh out loud. How long did he sit still? How did the photographer get him to smile so big? Did his teacher really slick his hair to one side?

I'm pretty sure if random people happened to see these pictures they would wonder why my two year old has a comb-over. One may assume I have a sick obsession with Donald Trump. Seriously, did Ms. Lippy lick her hand (ewww) or use paste for that side swipe?

Although I don't necessarily want at 8 x 10 of him standing on a mini-ladder in front of Spring flowers hanging anywhere in my house, I do want several to stick in an album or mail to grandparents for bribery purposes. Can you imagine his embarrassment when he's in his early teens?

"Oh, Mama, will you please tell Mimi to take down that awful picture...especially when all my cousins are over? They keep saying, 'Seacrest, out!' whenever I leave the room."

(Yes, Ryan Seacrest will be mostly bald by then, unless he get plugs which is even scarier.)

Dream #2

I dream that I am a college professor. I dream that I am teaching future teachers. I dream of reading and researching and preparing lessons and writing articles. I dream of being among other professors and learning their visions and theories.

I dream of inspiring that one student who will in turn reach many. I dream of reading about him/her and smiling because he/she was once in my office passionately defending the arts within the public school system.

I dream of never really retiring, maybe hanging around the college library in hopes of someone asking for my help or inviting me for coffee.

An Affair to Reconsider

Hello. May I speak with Mini Robin Eggs, please.

How dare you jump into my shopping cart! Then you make your way from my trunk to my kitchen. Ugh, the disgust! Wrangling your way into my lap while I watch mindless tv is just repulsive. Who would do such a thing? Even your popcorn-coattail-riding brother, plain 'ol Whoppers, would not take advantage of a woman with child. Just because you have a delusional pastel outer shell and a hint of chocolate doesn't mean you are not that bad for me. Your are much, much worse!

Although you are only half eaten I have every intention of tossing you in the trash...or giving you to the neighbor kids. How would you like that, huh? Yeah, didn't think so.

What? Whats that? American Idol is on tonight? At 8:00? Oh, and you want to watch it with me? Snuggling? Yes, that sounds nice, but... You promise, not too many? I don't know.... That's sweet. O.k. Hmmm hm, see you then.

Dammit.

Spring Fever

Warm breeze
Short sleeves
Bare feet

Long days
with
Orange sunsets

Salty air
and
Sandy toes

Pink cheeks
need
Sunscreen

Warm breeze
Short sleeves
Bare feet

Vacation over.

Pinching myself has not been needed the past few days, especially last night. My son decided it was a grand idea to poopy in the bathtub. Twice.

This morning he lost it when Boyfriend left for work. He usually tells his daddy to go to "yurk" and points to the door because The Wiggles are way more interesting that goodbye kisses.

This afternoon he refused to leave the gym. He wasn't even phased that I walked out the front door towards our car waving, "Bye-bye." I had to carry him out sideways on my hip because my preggie belly is too big to carry him in both arms.

Love, love, looooooove the grandparents. Hate, hate, hate the damage control.

Islamorada

Sometimes I pinch myself to know that my life is real.

Boyfriend and I are on vacation. (Boyfriend a.k.a. my husband.) We are celebrating our 5 year anniversary. Remember when 5 years seemed like an eternity? These years have passed like lightening and looking back I realize how very lucky I am. He loves me. I love him.

My in-laws are keeping my son and as I passed Jo Jo's Circus on tv this morning I had a small pang of missing him. He's having the time of his life eating too many cookies and staying up past bedtime, I know, but I wonder if he misses me, too.

The poolside is calling and I must fullfill my vacation duty. More later....

Pink

Yesterday I learned that I am having a little girl. This means pink. I don't even really like pink. Purple is nice but I know pink will take over. Pink blankets, pink onesies, pink bows, pink dresses, pink socks, pink pacies, pink everything. Pink gives me vertigo.

So, I'm a little nervous about having a girl. Sugar and spice and everything nice is not always the case...I remember my early teens. What if she wants to be in beauty pagents? Help me. What if she falls in love too early and leaves home with some cute, quiet artsy guy? What if she hates me because I'm to blame for all of her hang-ups? What if I really turn out to be the unhappiness in her heart?

I am honestly jittery about meeting this little love. Relationships between mothers and daughters are so delicate. Body image, self-esteem, respect...thinking about all of this leaves a huge lump in my throat.

These feelings were not present when my son was born...or is it that whole mommy-amnesia people speak of?

Dream #1

I dream that I am a true writer. One that actually sends in works with hopes of getting published. I dream of attending writer workshops and discussing the greats. I dream of writing rituals and routines and following them. These rituals often include too much coffee causing an obnoxious amount of pacing and erratic hand guestures. I dream of sitting by an old trusty typewritter slowly pulling my written pages only to ball and shoot into a full wastebasket. After an inspirational phone conversation or people watching during a parade I dig for that special ball of trash. I dream of that hopeful feeling that must accompany placing manuscripts into large manilla envelopes and walking to a post office. I dream of smiling at the post office worker and explaining that I just finished my first book.

Hey Blogger Monsters! Um, just ignore this post.

After being an avid blog reader for several years I decided to take the plunge. This is no big deal, right? I mean, I'm here typing away like I often do...only with the possibility of a much wider audience. Where did the butterflies in my stomach come from? Its as if a mean blogger monster is going to pop up any minute to tell me I'm unworthy of such expression and attempt to eat my fingers until she notices that my right thumb has been attacked by a cheese grater and gets disqusted at that, too.

I'm here and I plan/hope/want to stay, so, back off blogger monsters...um, please.